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| Photo: Life |
Things I am good at asking for:
- The phone numbers of attractive men (especially now that I'm in a relationship and it's not for me)
- That you pleasefortheloveofgod change the song
- That I be alerted when more tiny crab cakes are ready. Better yet, I'll just stand near the door of the kitchen so you can breeze by me on your way out.
Things I am not good at asking for:
- A explanation of why I'm suddenly being charged $50 more for the same salon service
- Anything below sticker price
- A raise
While I have no problem suggesting that your taste is music is sub-par or taking the risk that you might think I'm a glutton when it comes to the canapes, there's something about discussing money that makes me feel icky. Perhaps part of it is that I still use the word "icky" to describe my feelings. But i think it's more than that and I know I'm not alone. I've had this conversation with many a friend who feels the same. Only none of them were guys.
As much as I hate to make a sweeping generalization, I'm fairly convinced that men don't feel this way. In fact, statistics show that men don't have a problem asking for more money and notoriously ask for even more than they're worth. MORE. Ladies, that's some bullshit. Our male counterparts aren't wringing their hands, thinking "maybe I don't deserve more. I'm lucky to have a job at all in this economy. I sure hope asking for a raise doesn't make her think less of me." Yet that was almost exactly my internal monologue as I sat contorted into a pretzel the one time I brought up money with my boss, stumbling over my words and generally making it as awkward as possible. Needless to say, I still have the same salary I had over a year ago.
In spite of being consistently told that I do great work, I don't want anyone to think that I think I'm worth more than I am. Even that sentence sounds ridiculous. So what's my deal? I wish I knew, because I know how much I probably should be making and I'd rather not handle my career like I handled the salon situation. Which is to say I had to find a new stylist after two years because I couldn't bear to discuss her gratuitous price increase. I guess it's time to man up.
Maybe it'll be one of my New Year's resolutions.
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